Meaning & Means of Success

Success is a relative term and never the final destination. Because whatever we achieve at a given point in time, there will be lot more which can be achieved (and probably have been achieved by others). So being successful is essentially on a journey of achieving small or big milestones and then pursue for the next one.

Goals or Milestone are the results one wants to achieve, and systems & processes are the means to reach those goals or milestones. So, in the journey of achieving certain milestone or success, one should spend more time and effort in designing the systems and processes and spend less time thinking about the goal itself. A system once implemented that will help in small but continuous improvements and will eventually lead to the desired goal or milestone.

Reaching a milestone is just a momentary feeling of happiness and sense of achievement, which is also very important, because each milestone, however small or big actually influences the brain to do more in that direction of achievement.

When you try to focus on the problem of result and trying to find a solution, you are essentially taking an allopathic medicine to suppress a symptom. However, if you focus on systems, processes or habits for small but continuous improvements in the body, you are trying to address the root cause of the problem and hence the end result is more long term, and sustainable. So, try to fix the input and the outputs will be taken care of.

The purpose of setting a goal is to achieve something which is measurable. Whereas the purpose of the building the system is to continue to be in the process of achieving goals one after the other over a long period of time. So true long-term thinking is goal-less thinking. The commitment to the process that will determine the long-term and continuous progress in any given field. The results will follow in the due course of time.

Setting a goal can be sometimes self-limiting. Because more often than not, we tend to achieve the goal and don't attempt to go beyond the goal. However, robust systems/processes/habits can actually help us to rise above the limits of goal setting. So, if you want results, then focus on the systems, processes and habits and not the goal itself.

Good habits like, exercise, meditation, journaling etc fizzle out and become a hassle to practice after few days of initial euphoria. Whereas bad habits like junk food eating, binge TV watching etc very easily come back into our lives. So, to address the above problem of keeping the good habits and shunning the bad habits, one must try to associate them with the current of future identity of himself/herself. Identity based habits are easier to practice over a long period of time, because the motivation is coming from within. So, change in the approach should be from “I want this” to “I am this”.

The more deeply a thought or action is tied to your identity, the more difficult it is to change. The biggest barrier to the positive change at any level is the identity conflict. Example: A good habit may look very rational thing to do, but if that conflicts with one’s identity, then putting that good habit into action will be very difficult. Conversely, whatever, we practice over a long period of time, we become that person eventually because every day we are becoming good at that skill or activity. A case in point is about many of the writers. Most of them, were not born with some special talent to become of good writer, but with persistent efforts and practice, they became the authors of famous books, magazines and so on. So, the process of building habits is actually the process of “Being Yourself” over a long period of time.

Each good habit not only gets results, but also teaches you to trust yourself. If creates that self-affirmation or self-belief that you can achieve something for which you have set up the process/system/habit. If the inputs (efforts/habits) don’t change substantially, the outcome/results also will not change substantially.

Your identity decides your habits and new habits create your new identity.

The focus should always be on becoming the type of person and not getting a particular outcome or result. Because results are driven by not your own efforts, but also concurrently the external influences of the others/situations etc. which you cannot influence much. So, decide the type of person you want to be and then prove it to yourself with small wins daily/regularly.

People who are relatively more successful than the rest are good at a habit called – story telling. And storytelling doesn't mean only verbal, but it could be written as well.

And the story telling does not come naturally to them but have been practiced over a long period of times through the life’s different experiences, projects, activities, etc. These are also the people who are good listeners, good observers and fast learners.

Can someone start building this habit at any of time in their life? Absolutely.

Invest time in daily /regular reading of variety of subjects, daily or regular journaling or writing, intentionally develop the skill to be good listener, try to work range of different projects, try to travel to different places. All these can help you to start working the habit of storytelling.